Day 8: The Future

Welcome to Day 8!

I had another topic planned for today, but decided to put it on hold.  One of the things I have the most problem with special needs parenting is talking about the future.  The future could be a year or 2.  Or it could be more than 5 or 10.  With Ashleigh, it is hard to look in the future.  Whether it be a year or more.

When I think of the boy's future, I see driving a car (God, help me!).  I see high school graduation with the entire class.  I see them going off to college.  Us packing up the van and driving them to their new college.  Helping unload the van, hugging them, and saying good bye.  Then, crying in the van.  I see a college graduation.  Somewhere in there will be dating.  (Again, God help me).  I pray that this girl will not kick us out of his life.  That she is warm and loving.  That she treats our son with kindness and love.  Somewhere in there he will get married.  I pray again that his wife keeps us in their lives. (Reason behind this due to a brother that does not have anything to do with his family).  I see children in their future if that is what they want.  

Thinking of the boys' future is not that hard on me as it is when it comes to Ashleigh's future.  It is hard when we don't know.  We don't know if Ashleigh will be walking.  We don't know if Ashleigh's reading will improve.  We don't know if Ashleigh will be able to drive a car.  For Ashleigh to drive a car, she has to take a test.  Her rehab doctor will send us to this location about an hour from home.  I do not know much about this since Ashleigh is 15.  I am thinking about waiting a year or 2 until we send her to do this.  Ashleigh is not emotionally 15.  I do not feel that Ashleigh is ready to drive a car.  To make decisions that could be life or death.  Shawn and I will talk about this a lot.

Ashleigh's graduation will be a small group of special needs kids.  I am not sure if we will do the graduation with the rest of her class or not.  We will talk to Ashleigh about the noise and to see if she can do it.  We won't be there for the entire graduation.  She is in the beginning of the alphabet with our last name, but the noise will be an issue.

Can you think of the future with your kids?

Melissa